Challenge Land
(as it would be for the Krycek Little Black Dress challenge)
Viridian5: Ah, Challenge Land. Sounds like Walt Disney World’s newest theme section.
If only.
Te: *giggle* Can I take the Alex Krycek-in-Sunnydale ride, please?
Viridian5: And think of those employees dressed up....
Te: I AM
Viridian5: And hell yes I want a souvenir.
Te: Oh yes
Viridian5: The concession possibilities are endless!
Te: I’m going straight for the Nummy Treats...
Viridian5: Mmm-hmm.
Viridian5: Useful frou frou for once.
Te: Please oh please
Viridian5: Why, you might never want to leave!
Te: Never ever...
Viridian5: Which brings us to the next money making aspect of Challenge Land. Slum lording. Because someone has to take advantage of-- uhm, service-- uh, provide housing for those inevitable folks security can’t hunt down and toss out once they get in.
Te: *cackling*
Viridian5: It’s a gold mine, darlin’!
Viridian5: People will pay to work there!
Te: <--still grinning dopily
Viridian5: (Okay, odds are that no one will want to insure them, but hey.)
Viridian5: And every little girl and boy will want a Krycek of their own to love and abuse and dress up and sodomize....
Te: bwahahahahahahahAAA
Viridian5: Kryceks are so multi-purpose after all. A home entertainment system all rolled up in one luscious man.
Te: *drool*
Viridian5: Plus leather and guns and kinky accessories. What’s not to like?
Viridian5: I imagine we’d have sub-areas of Fetish Land, Bondage Land, Amputation Land, Possession Land....
Te: *bwahahahahahhahahahaaaa*
Viridian5: The Push-Old-Smoky-Down-the-Stairs ride....
Viridian5: The Russian-truck-with-no-brakes ride....
Te: The chased-by-men-with-whips er... ride...
Viridian5: Of course, with that one they have a problem with some people not trying very hard to get away from the men with whips.
Viridian5: Unfortunate, but what would you expect of the clientele that would be drawn to Challenge Land?
Te: Hence the men with whips trip over them and it’s all a big mess.
Viridian5: Yeah, we really get to test that old saw about whether horses will trample live, moving bodies.
Te: *bwahahahahaaa*
Viridian5: But it’s all part of the heady allure of Challenge Land.
Viridian5: And watch out for surprises in the Men’s Room!
Te: I love you. <g>
Viridian5: heh heh heh
Viridian5: Aw! I’m glad my utter twistedness makes you happy.
Te: Heady allure *bawahahhaaaa*
Viridian5: Like the man himself.
Viridian5: Challenge Land. Where everybody smells like leather and gun oil!
Te: With the occasional hint of bleach...
Viridian5: Yep.
Viridian5: Though I suggest you stay away from Bobbing Through Oil concession stand.
Te: It gets everywhere...
Viridian5: And who really knows what you’re bobbing for?
Viridian5: (Besides, there’s only one activity in Challenge Land that really requires bobbing.....)
Te: *euuugh* Good point.
Te: *cackling*
Viridian5: I also suggest staying away from the genetic engineering booth. You never know what little surprises they’ll graft into you. For instance, the pheromone ability sounds good, but it has all sorts of drawbacks, really.
Viridian5: Actually, the employees may have to worry about being molested by the customers. Then again, some employees might see that as a benefit. It’s all in how we spin this while looking for applicants.
Te: "Do you look like characters on certain TV shows?"
"Do you like leather?"
"Are you a slut?"
"Then come on down to Challenge-Land! We’ve got the job for you!"
Viridian5: We’ll be beating applicants off with sticks.
So to speak.
Te: I’ve always pictured almost martial arts-like moves for that... like, maybe the only safe way to beat someone off with a stick.
Viridian5: I imagine you’d have to be careful if you still wanted your equipment to work afterward.
Te: It takes a great deal of skill.
Viridian5: People who can do that are no doubt in high demand. And are paid accordingly.
Te: Of course. <g>
Viridian5: But maybe Challenge Land has the budget needed to hire one.
Te: Ah, the I-can-beat-you-with-one-hand ride....
Viridian5: Ha!
That would be fun to watch. And participate in.
Viridian5: You can also ride the Hong Kong phonebank. Only for the hardcore visitor.
Te: And again, there’d be people who’d volunteer...
Viridian5: Hell, maybe we could get them to pay us.
Te: bwahahahaaaaa
Viridian5: We could milk this sucker. Put up some cameras not just for the they’re-watching ambiance but also so we can make people pay-per-view.
Te: You know, I could watch several hours of men getting humped against phonebanks...
Viridian5: And, again, some people would see being filmed as yet another attraction.
Viridian5: So could I! So could many people, I bet.
Te: It’s a goodness.
Viridian5: It’s a public service. Hey! Maybe we could get people who have to do public service hours to work. Government would pay us to take them on. And some of them would be *koff* scared straight. The others probably wouldn’t want to leave.
Te: "You mean I get to pistol-whip my coworkers?"
Viridian5: Not to mention all the humping.
Te: I wanna go!
Viridian5: Me too!