"To Have, to Own, to Hold IV: Simple Gifts" By Viridian5 1998 RATING: NC-17. If m/m interaction bothers you, you don't know what you're missing. SPOILERS: none really. SUMMARY: An exchange of gifts. Pendrell/"Weaknesses" Mulder (the Fox personality, here calling himself Michael) DISTRIBUTION: Anywhere, as long as you ask first. DISCLAIMERS: All things X-Files belong to Chris Carter, Ten- Thirteen, and 20th Century Fox. Main title from "Age of Greed" by Killing Joke. I'm just sharing and not making a cent off any of this, I swear! No infringement intended. Suing me would be a waste of time and a mean thing to do. I have no money. At all. FEEDBACK: can be sent to Viridian5@aol.com NOTES: Warning, major schmoop ahead. This was what I'd originally intended for Te's birthday present, but it gave me fits and blocked me, so I finished "Grace II" and made that one her present instead. So you can consider this a second, late birthday present. Thank Te, everyone! Thanks to Dreamer for stepping up to the beta plate! Takes place in the "Weaknesses" universe sometime after "Weaknesses III: The Price We Pay" but isn't in the story arc. You don't need to be familiar with the series to follow this story. =============================================== "To Have, to Own, to Hold IV: Simple Gifts" By Viridian5 =============================================== Daniel Pendrell sprawled on his couch and tried to fight his headache down. The headache kept winning. Mr. Whiskers purred from her perch on his chest as he stroked her and she left orange cat hair all over his suit. He would chide himself later for not getting out of the suit first. For now, he just wanted to die. Aside from the memory of general stupidity at work bothering him, he also felt sad and self-pitying. He'd made a sacrifice recently, with all the best intentions, and couldn't help feeling a little resentful. //He didn't ask you to, and he doesn't know. This is all you, Danny. Your choice.// Two weekends ago he'd been lying in bed with Michael when he'd done something selfish. He occasionally had those moments, when he wanted something so much he stopped thinking about whether it would be right. Michael sometimes talked in his sleep, sometimes as himself and sometimes in slightly different voices that suggested one of the other personalities had control, that Danny slept next to Marty or William instead. That freaked Danny out no end, but he dealt with it. Sometimes you could ask Michael things when he was in that state, and he would answer. Sometimes the answers even made sense. Some things Michael refused to talk about, and Danny would not ask. //Like whether he's really Mulder or not. But I think I already know the answer to that one...// But with his birthday coming up, Danny's mind wouldn't stop tracking on certain thoughts, which became full-fledged need-to-knows. Need-to- know colored his whole life, from his relationships to his choice of career. If he could put Michael under a microscope and tease out his secrets, Danny would, gladly, and do so with all the love he felt. It would be wrong to ask now, with Michael asleep and helpless to say no, but he couldn't help himself. "When's your birthday, Michael?" Michael had sighed and nuzzled in closer. "You just want to know how old I am," he mumbled sleepily and smiled. Asleep and relaxed, he looked even younger. Danny traced the bullet scar on his lover's shoulder. "No, I really want to know. I want to do something nice for it. A little party." "I'm older than you, you know. Physically, at least. Danny--" A non sequitur, but one that made Danny's heart guiltily leap. Michael had let slip one of the things he'd wanted to know. In attitude, Michael seemed younger, but sometimes... "I don' have a birthday." "Don't... don't *have* a birthday." "Wasn' *born *. More... hatched." "You don't--" Of course Michael didn't. Michael shared one body with a few different personalities, and he wasn't the original. Not many people knew about this. Michael hadn't really been born. Michael's sleeping face started to gain lines, look troubled. Some part of him knew he'd let something out he shouldn't have. "It's September 29th." September 29th was Michael the Archangel's day on the calendar. Michael had tried to cover his mistake. In that moment, Danny decided he wouldn't make an issue of his own birthday, not when Michael didn't have one. Michael wouldn't remember this conversation in the morning. Danny would let it slide. But tonight, with his birthday tomorrow, Danny regretted it, even if he'd had good impulses behind his decision. The Pendrell family always made a big deal out of birthdays, with parties and presents. Sean would be working tomorrow, and a day as an occupational therapy assistant left his younger brother too tired to do much of anything when he got home. Besides, Danny hadn't brought Michael by to meet Sean yet. He didn't know why he hadn't--he wasn't ashamed of Michael, exactly--but he hadn't found the right time. Michael and Sean might even like each other, since they were both musicians and even enjoyed some of the same music. Mom and Dad had died in a car wreck three years ago, a still-fresh wound. So the only one who could make a fuss over Danny on his actual birthday didn't know about it, by Danny's choice. No wonder his head hurt. The sound of the key turning in the lock made him wince, even as he felt himself brighten a bit at the thought of the person using it. Michael would make the headache go away. Michael, loaded down with scores of shopping bags, looked surprised to see him on the couch. "You look beat," he said as he knelt down next to Danny. "A bad day, topped off with a worse headache." Michael took his hand and kissed it, to Danny's surprise. Michael could be thoughtfulness personified, but it still shocked him when the older man--and it was still so odd thinking of Michael that way--made a gesture that was so caring and so *perfect*. "I'm sorry. Damn, your hand is cold." Michael gently slipped Danny's hand beneath his coat to warm it with his body heat. He then leaned back to rest against the couch and his lover. It struck Danny as one of the most oddly erotic things he'd ever experienced. As the fingers of his right hand slowly uncurled while wrapped in his lover's warmth, the other hand started to stroke cool, still-damp hair. Michael always came to him freshly showered, perhaps to wash off the scent and feel of the primary personality who used the body the rest of the day. With Wik purring on his chest and Michael doing his own version of purring beneath his hands, Danny relaxed under the love of the two felines who owned him. Michael rubbed his cheek against Danny's side, furthering the cat analogy and making the younger man smile. They sat like that for a while, just lost in sensation and the feel of one another. Finally, Michael opened his eyes and grinned. "This is so nice, but I had plans for tonight." Danny felt a pleasant shiver in his stomach. "What kind of plans?" "Just staying in and doing something special." With obvious regret, Michael stood up and picked up his bags. "Have you taken anything?" He meant for the headache. "A half hour ago. It hasn't done anything yet." "I hope this makes you feel better. Don't go anywhere. I have to put everything together." He dropped two of the bags off at the kitchen before taking the other two into the bathroom with him. The sound of running water followed, piquing Danny's curiosity. Michael had just taken a shower, so the water had to be for him. Danny put Mr. Whiskers on the floor and carefully got up, the bags in the kitchen calling him. He just had his hands on a plastic handle when he got swept back by strong arms into a tight embrace. "It's supposed to be a surprise, Danny," the older man said into his hair as he rocked him. "Can't blame me for trying." Danny leaned back and stroked the bare arms. He liked the way Michael, taller than him, could wrap around him like a favorite quilt. One of his hands strayed down Michael's leg until it found a hole in the old jeans and caressed warm skin. The older man gasped and jerked. "Later, I swear. And I guess they're right." "About what?" "Cold hands, warm heart. I'm almost done setting up. Can I trust you not to get into things till then? I really want this to be a surprise. Well, surprises. I'm almost done with the first." Far be it from Danny to screw up something important to Michael. "Okay, but don't take too long." Grinning, Michael let him go and returned to the bathroom. Danny leaned back against the wall to wait. A nerve-wracking five minutes later, three minutes after the water had stopped running, Michael came back out. Danny, wrapped up in the pain of his headache with his eyes closed, hadn't really seen him before. He wore his usual silver ankh on a short chain, an old and faded T-shirt, tall Docs that laced up to his knees, and faded, tight black jeans that had holes in some interesting places. He looked delicious, and Danny felt a surge of desire. Danny didn't resist when Michael tied a blindfold over his eyes, though he felt curiosity eating him alive. The older man put a hand on his arm and carefully led him somewhere warm that smelled of lavender and musk before taking the blindfold off. The bathroom had been transformed. Candles cast warm, flickering light, and bottles of mysterious oil lined the rim of a tub filled with water that gave off the faintest scent of musk. A large bath pillow rested at one end. Luxuriously fluffy towels waited nearby. "You like? It's all for you," Michael said as he vibrated next to Danny. He grinned when he saw the look on his lover's face. "It's... wonderful. Decadent." Did Michael know, after all? "I wanted to do something special." Michael started to slowly and sensually undress Danny. Danny melted into the knowing touches and grinned as his lover neatly hung the suit and shirt. //He knows me so well...// Michael helped him into the tub and leaned him back against the pillow. The hot water brought a pleasant shock to Danny's skin as the nerves sizzled to life. Steam and the scent of musk insinuated themselves up his nostrils and into his head, clearing and soothing. His muscles started to unkink. "Just consider me your bath slave," Michael said as he picked up a wet washcloth and ran it over his lover's skin. "You're going to get all wet." Danny had a very naughty thought of being tended to by a stark naked Michael. That and the feel of the washcloth descending down his stomach almost brought him off. He grabbed Michael by the arm and pulled him in. Fortunately, it was a very big tub. Water splashed everywhere. Michael sputtered and laughed. "I have my boots on, you nut! At least they're old clothes." He moaned when Danny drew him in for a deep, needy kiss. Nothing like having six feet of wet, squirming Goth on top of you to make you forget small things like headaches. "This wasn't what I had in mind... oh, Danny..." Their erections, one bared and one confined by sopping fabric, brushed. They slid against one another, laughing and moaning. Danny's hands slowly fumbled wet denim and cotton out of the way. The fabrics fought him maliciously. Finally he succeeded in pulling them down far enough. He stroked Michael's already hard cock, and his own jumped in sympathy. He heard Michael begging against his lips, "Fuck me, Danny, please, now, please..." "Turn around," Danny said. Desperate, Michael tried to comply, with much splashing of water. It was a measure of how far into lust Danny had descended that he didn't give a damn about the mess they were making. The older man's body rubbed against his on every attempt, making him even crazier. Finally Michael managed to turn around, and Danny had that perfect ass exactly where he wanted it. Fingers already slick with bath oil, the younger man slid them up into a hot tightness that never failed to amaze him. He found the spot he wanted and stroked. Michael panted and shivered, shamelessly begging. Danny had gone past being able to stand the preliminaries himself. He removed his fingers with one long glide, then stroked his cock in, immediately setting a fast, demanding rhythm. Michael helped as much as he could, pushing back to take his lover in as far as possible. Their sliding around in the wet tub made it more unpredictable than usual, but neither minded. Danny reached for Michael's cock and stroked it ruthlessly. Michael shrieked as he exploded, his internal muscles clenching around and milking Danny until he too fell into a blinding orgasm. They panted together for a while, before they went still and just rested together. Finally, Michael laughed and said, "I didn't plan that, but I definitely can't complain. You surprised me, huh?" He kissed the side of Danny's neck. "Danny?" Michael grinned at the sight of his lover passed out with a blissful expression on his face. The water *had* been hot, and Danny *had* looked so tired... Michael brought more water than he wanted out with him as he clambered out of the tub. Pulling his jeans up so he could move presented a problem he needed five minutes to fix. As much as he would have liked to shuck off his sopping clothing, he knew he wouldn't be able to untie his boots for anything. He might have to cut the laces later. Being unable to take his boots off meant being unable to take his jeans off. Michael smiled ruefully as he started to get Danny ready for the rest of the evening. ****************************************************** Danny awoke alone in cool water. Michael must have put the tray across the tub that stopped Danny from sliding under and drowning. Danny heard the faint sound of music from beyond the closed door. //What is he up to? He said there would be more coming...// Feeling loose and indolent but also painfully curious, he sat up and looked around. Michael had even mopped up all the water that should have flooded the floor. //Am I domesticating him? Or is it just that he loves me that much?// His clothing had disappeared, but something deep blue and lustrous rested folded next to the towels. He stood up and used one of the wonderfully thick towels to dry off, sighing at the way it felt against his oiled, sensitized skin. He wrapped the towel around his waist, then picked up the object of his interest. Slick, soft silk teased his hands as the robe unfolded in front of him. The candlelight rippled across deep blue, almost indigo, fabric. Danny petted it with a lump in his throat. It was beautiful, and obviously meant for him. //Oh, Michael.// When Danny put it on and tied the belt, he moaned at how the fabric felt as it slid back and forth across his cock. He wanted to grab Michael *now* and make sure the older man knew how much he appreciated all of this. More surprises ahead... Danny opened the door and yelled, "Is it safe to come out yet?" "Sure. I'm in the dining room." Michael had transformed the dining room into an exotic, mysterious place as well. More candles, and incense made the air a heady, intriguing thing to breathe. Michael took Danny's breath away. Dressed in black velvet and leather with silver accents, the older man had put on his best. The candlelight brought out blond and red fire in his soft chestnut hair. His smile threatened to outdo the candles. Then Danny saw Mr. Whiskers and started to sputter. The big orange tabby had a small, blue party hat perched atop her head and a huge blue bow tied around her neck. She looked really pissed off. When his sputtering turned to giggles, the cat turned what Danny would swear was a dirty look on Michael. Michael looked back at her, shrugged, and said, "So I lied." Danny lost it, writhing with laughter. Every time he looked up and saw that expression of offended feline dignity, he just started to chortle harder. It hurt, but in a good way. When he started to wind down, Michael helped him to the table to sit down. Danny noticed that Michael had polished the boots he wore, different from the ones he had on earlier, to within an inch of their lives. Danny could see himself in them. Although the reflection was a little distorted, he saw a pale man with fiery hair wearing a gorgeous ankle-length robe. And he looked deliriously happy. Michael seated himself across from Danny and picked up a spoon. Danny finally saw the ice cream sundae that sat on the table between them. Vanilla ice cream with hot fudge topping, whipped cream, and a neon cherry. Just like the sundae they'd shared the first time they met. A spoon of his own rested near his hand. "Happy birthday, Danny," Michael said with a beautiful smile. "How did you know?" "I have my ways. Now let's dig in. We still have more to come." //More to come...// Danny picked up his spoon and dug in. Michael flirted outrageously over the ice cream, doing things to it and his spoon with his mouth and tongue that made Danny want to reach across the table for him. But waiting would only make it better. Gilded, bright green eyes smoldered into blue. Finally, only the cherry remained. While Danny had had fun fighting for it that first time, tonight he conceded. "You have it, Michael." He wanted to watch. Michael didn't disappoint. He picked it up by the stem and licked it clean. His teeth caressed the intensely red skin once before he devoured it in three delicate yet savage bites. Michael stood and came around the table. He slid Danny's chair around, then kneeled in front of his lover. "Danny, I had such a hard time finding a gift for you. You want so little, at least where material things are concerned." "Michael--" Michael put a finger to his lips. "Hush. Let me finish, please. You've given me so much. You're the only person who ever treated me like I was a real human being instead of a toy or an unwanted appendage to my primary personality. You're so kind and so loving... You gave me life, Danny. I never loved anyone before I met you." Danny could barely breathe past the lump in his throat. "Michael--" "That's my gift to you, Danny. That you know how much you mean to me. And for tonight..." This next bit seemed to come harder, and Michael's eyes darkened with pain. "and tonight only, I'll answer anything you want to ask me. Anything. That's how much I love you." Danny understood the enormity of what Michael offered. He could ask anything, demand any precious secret, and Michael would give it up. Anything... If the devil ever came up to tempt him, this would be the offer. The older man stared at him with terror plain in his spring green eyes. Michael offered total exposure and the right to strip him of all his bright and dark secrets. All questions died on Danny's lips. He couldn't do this. He didn't need to know who Michael's body was the rest of the time, even if it turned out to be Mulder, a total asshole, after all. Magic always suffered when you robbed it of all its mysteries. //I don't want to know, not if it will hurt him. My God, he does know me... and must love me desperately.// All that mattered was that Michael was Michael when he was with Danny. Danny stroked Michael's hair. "I want you to keep your secrets. You, as you are... You're my gift." Michael closed his eyes and started to breathe again. "Thank you," he said softly. He grinned shakily. "I like your outfit." "Fairies left it for me." Michael laughed. "But you're overdressed." He untied the belt and let the silk slither off Danny's lap. "Michael, you don't have to... oh..." A cool tongue lapped at his cock using a technique his lover had demonstrated on a spoon only a few minutes ago. Nibbling kisses followed. With the state of low-grade arousal Danny had been in since he put the robe on, he knew he couldn't last much longer. "Michael--" he moaned. Michael knew. He drew Danny's cock into his cool, sticky mouth and deep-throated it, milking Danny as hard as he could. Danny gripped his lover's velvet-clad shoulders as he came. Once Michael finished sucking, he slithered up Danny's chest and kissed him. The younger man's hands slid over Michael's ass, luxuriating in the leather that clung so tightly to the skin. "Bed?" Michael asked shakily. Danny grinned at the thought of unwrapping his present. "What do you think?" ****************************************************** Fox idly stroked his lover's hair with one hand and the cat with the other. Both snuggled up against him. "But Danny will always be my favorite," he said softly to Mr. Whiskers, who only stared at him. "That's okay, you're not my type," her eyes seemed to say. So long as he petted and fed her, she would forgive him for the hat and bow. He pulled Danny closer to him. "You're my gift," Danny had said. Fox couldn't even name all the things he felt right now. Delirious happiness. Overwhelming love. Pride that he'd pulled it all off. //Fox?// Fox sighed. At least Mulder had been absent the rest of the night. Whether it had been out of respect for Fox's privacy or a personal desire to avoid experiencing sex with someone Mulder called, at his kindest, "LabBoy" was an issue Fox didn't intend to concern himself with. //This was an incredible thing you planned.// //What I mean is that you *planned* it. Weeks in advance.// //Not that long ago you couldn't even think a few days in advance. You were completely "now"-oriented, like a child. Have you noticed any differences?// [Leave the boy alone, Mulder,] William said. [We can't change.] Partly to spite William, but also because it was the truth, Fox said, Mulder's voice seemed to be torn between disbelief and throat- choking happiness. //I think you're growing up.// [Oh, please.] Growing up? Fox wondered... As he drifted into sleep entangled with his lover, Fox gave thanks for all the gifts he'd given and received. **********************THE END***********************